Non Acknowledgments

The People I Would NOT Like to Thank the Most For this Work

Roonalda Borhemanian for pulling my hair in the first grade

Tom Hanks for never returning my calls

Nicole Degraceless for dating my brother

Donald Trump for stealing my comeover...um, comeforward

Luke Skywalker for kissing his sister...instead of me

Geico for making my pet gecko seem untalented

Bert Jamethson for dumping me

Guinevere for cheating on Arthur

Mr Twitcherdum for failing me

My first four cats for dying

Pamela for having red hair

Julene for having red hair

More to come...later

The Greatest Book Never Written

a blog

Princess Kathleen

published by nevergoingtobepublished

Books by the Author

Never Written Series

One Million Ways to Peel an Orange

This Shall Never be Read

How to Not Write a New York Times Bestseller

Title Page

The Greatest Book Never Written